today was the day…

the day i, truly, became a man…

today, i went to the o.b.g.y.n.

(bum, bum, bum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

yep today was our first of many visits to come.

it was just as you’d think; floral printed chairs, awkward moments of silence interrupted by random coughing, and out of date magazines as far as the eye could see!

i, myself, found a lovely copy of  ebony magazine’s “sexy issue” featuring kelly rowland and (muh boi) trey songz… so major shout out there…

anywhoo…

the moment comes…

they call our names… well, her name…

she pees in a cup, and we’re off!

back to some tiny corner room with some octopus looking computer… the ultrasound thingy…

what an intimidating piece of machinery…

it just sits there staring at you…

and the room is freezing…

guys, tip number one… bring a sweater.

and then there are nurses coming in, asking questions, and asking me, “are you ok?”…

why are they asking me that?…

oh yeah, i forgot to mention, at this point things have gotten very, very… real…

i mean, the news is sinking in.

no more make believing folks, this is the real deal.

at this point my face has lost some color and i’m trying to remember how to breathe.

there’s a shrinking feeling taking over my body, and… wow…

i mean i’m trying my best to give you a real idea of how overwhelmingly scary this all is…

girls, kudos to you, i don’t know how you all can do this so often, and by yourselves…

like i said… boys are wussies.

i mean i was way to panicky to even care that this old guy is assaulting my wife in front of me… (by old guy, i’m talking about the doctor…)

and then… the lights go dim…..

showtime..

it doesn’t take but a split second, and i’m staring at an image on the screen…

it looks like a little blinking lima bean with noodles shooting out of it…

our baby.

now i’m not one for cussing… and to be honest, i don’t even remember this… but at that moment, the magnitude of the situation must have taken over, processed through my brain and all that my mouth could come up with was a whispered,  “holy sh!t”…

how incredible.  before this moment that baby, basically, only existed in our heads… and then, there he/she was… not really staring back at us… i think it was asleep… but there it was!

you know that moment in jaws where brody sees the shark for the first time, and the cigarette barely hangs on to his open mouth and he gives that famous line we all love to quote?

that’s what it felt like.

awe, shock, amazement and fear, all rolled into one.

“you’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

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